Lockdown has caused pressure to rise in all areas of life, so it is no surprise relationships around the world are feeling it too.
This will especially be the case if the two of you have been cooped up in the same space. This may have seemed like a dreamy new adventure to begin with, or maybe you have both lived together for a while. Either way, your usual routines have been exchanged for a sombre Groundhog Day.
After almost a year of restrictive living, it is completely understandable to feel like you’re living under each other’s feet.
This can cause frustration and guilt for wanting more space. Don’t feel guilty – quality time can only truly be achieved by finding healthy space and a balance of attachment.
If you’re having problems in this regard, here are some ways to manage a lockdown together.
- Respectful spaces. You may not be lucky enough to have a lovely big house with a garden to spread your wings in, and if you find yourself in a tiny apartment this could result in a lack of space to work together. Your partner may work from home or you may have hobbies that take up room. Take time to communicate your spaces and the things you may need. Is it desk space? A co-habituated dining room table? Time-slots sound rigid but can be very helpful in balancing each other’s desired space.
- Allocate ‘date’ time. Date night may have changed for you both due to lockdown, but that time together should still be treated the same. Pick a day or time that suits for you both to spend time in each other’s company and get creative with ideas. This will not only allow you both to have quality time, but also squash any fears of withdrawal from each other.
- Weekly check-ins. Being mindful of your partner’s emotions is a great skill, although it can be tricky to maintain with the heavy cloud of current affairs. Creating an honest and non-judgmental space to vent at the end of every week keeps emotions in-check and most importantly heard.
No relationship is perfect and coping during exceptional times is an achievement in itself. It’s important to recognise that everyone is dealing with lockdown in different ways.
Working with each other rather than against one another is the way forward into the new year.
Featured image credit: Theresa Kelly Photography
I'm a young 20-something-year-old currently facing the next chapter after university, who needs a stool to reach the top cupboards and has an outrageous passion for talking. Writing has always been an outlet for myself and a very useful tool in slowing my thoughts down. I have a muddled brain that loves a good natter!
Loved it Hattie, always love reading your writing. Big love from a big fan. see you sometime soon, B xx
Thank you so much, Brontë xxxx