October 2021. I was sitting in the common area in the student accommodation of the University of Stirling. “I wish we had a normal first-year experience. More socials, more activities, more of everything”, I said sadly.
My friends sighed with me simultaneously and we went on complaining.
Now, one year after our first-year experience in lockdown, we are slowly getting back to normal.
The university clubs have socials and regular meet-ups. Many events are being hosted by the university and union. We all wanted this after all. We asked for this.
Why is it that I feel so tired then?
There is so much to do that I constantly deal with the famous fear of missing out. Additionally, it’s overwhelming getting thrown into normal social activities out of nowhere.
How does socialising even work?
It is intimidating to deal with crowds, more people, and gatherings out of one’s control.
Connecting to fellow students seems like “the right thing to do”. It almost feels like an obligation that I am not fulfilling if I don’t go out.
It was a turning point for me to realise that everyone is dealing with this kind of anxiety in one way or another. Since we didn’t experience any social activities last year all of the second-guessing got postponed to now.
What is the solution?
Well, for me it’s all about understanding what I actually want.
Do I seek to go out for the sake of going out or do I want genuine connection?
When you socialise and pressure yourself to do so, even though you don’t want to, you can end up in bad sometimes even dangerous situations. It is important to listen to your intuition and listen to yourself. No opportunity is running away, and you definitely shouldn’t go out just to prove something.
Social activities are all about enjoying life, your friends and one another as a community. If it is not this event, it can be another.
The pressure of fitting in shouldn’t drive you away from the person that you are.
Go out and make friends or stay in and watch a movie. What matters is that you are having fun.
Feature image credit: Pexels Free Photos
You must log in to post a comment.