I grew up with Minecraft. At age nine my Dad installed it on his iPad for my sister and I to share. We struggled to understand at first, dying quickly and playing mostly in creative mode. 12 years on, and Minecraft has had frequent resurgences in my life, most notably in the pandemic. The game created a world I wanted to escape into – a world in my control, full of possibilities and companionship, a space to bond with strangers and friends.
This space did not exist in A Minecraft Movie.
The film opened with Minecraft’s nostalgic text. A promising start, paired with the key four notes of the game’s iconic music. And yet, it was all downhill from there – with the exception of the film nailing the entertainment value and creating the most surprisingly enjoyable cinema experience I’ve ever had.
The characters were…interesting
Jack Black as Steve made a smashing opening sequence. Narrating the montages, he powerfully and clearly set the premise of the plot, drawing laughs from the audience meer minutes into the film. Black instantly stole the show – in fact, the opening sequence of the plot line very happily could have formed the entire film.
But it didn’t. There were four unnecessary characters to introduce.
Following a Jumanji-style thought process, it was needed to drop four strange characters into Steve’s world. Not one character felt like a real person, and so it was hard to connect to them, even from a ‘brain rot’ perspective. From costumes (did they all shop at Primark?) to dialogue, they collectively felt clunky and unnatural.
The two women, Natalie (Emma Myers) and Dawn (Danielle Brooks) served one purpose, and that just seemed to make the film pass the Bechdel test. They added nothing to the plot except for cringe-worthy, stiff lines and a touch of diversity. To lift them out entirely would change nothing. Literally, nothing.
The two other characters, Garret ‘Garbage Man’ Garrison (Jason Momoa) and Henry (Sebastian Eugene Hansen) did sort of help Steve out, but I really got the sense that they simply hindered the protagonist in his mission to defeat the completely random villain – Malgosha.
Out of all the pre-existing villains, why was an X-Factor-dropout-Pigman the choice? We could have had the Ender Dragon, The Wither, or even Herobrine…it felt disconnected, as though the Minecraft theme was more of a stylistic choice than anything.
Minecraft physics and inconsistencies
Minecraft has its own set of physics. They don’t adhere to the real world, but surely, surely they should adhere in the literal Minecraft movie?
Because there are so many inconsistencies compared to the game, I’ve shortened what was prominently noticed into a simple list:
- If you dig upwards, you need three if not four blocks of space to make way for your staircase. Not one! That doesn’t work!
- A ‘full set of diamond armour’ INCLUDES TROUSERS.
- You can’t get that much oak wood with no tools! At least make it into planks to make it slightly believable.
- Was it set in Creative or Survival mode? Well, we can assume Survival, but my goodness it was ambiguous.
- You need to have gone to the End to get Elytra. Steve has not been to the End.
- DOGS SHOULD TELEPORT. Huge plothole here. HUGE.
- All the sheep were pink… those are rare. Right?
Deeply unsettling textural choices
The 3D effect that made the film seem strangely realistic was an interesting approach. Initially, it added a fun textural, immersive effect. However, as the film proceeded, it became deeply unsettling.
At one point (no spoilers) Steve is shown to make a small house out of pink wool. Cute, and relatable, but the fluffiness felt really wrong. It was like wet cotton wool. The nasty texture somehow stole from the nostalgic aim of the scene.
Speaking of fluffy textures, the Creepers were fluffy. Since when? The sound indicates the texture of the block in the game, yet here, there were very few nostalgic sound effects that may have linked the film to the game more. Maybe media convergence isn’t always the answer.
The music – where to start?
The soundtrack of Minecraft is iconic. It is wonderful, blessed, akin to Mozart…and barely present in this film.
I wish I knew why, because the choice was made to replace it with a generic soundtrack, briefly interrupted by Jack Black bursting into completely random song snippets. I felt mildly assaulted by the musical aspect. It’s not what I signed up for – I wasn’t expecting it. Was it needed? No. Did I appreciate it? It’s growing on me.
If anyone other than Jack Black had attempted Lava Chicken, it would have been a terrible flop. But somehow, Jack Black brings everything together.
Entertainment value
All of this aside, the entertainment value of the film was immense. A Minecraft Movie created the strongest, happiest atmosphere in a cinema that I have ever experienced. When iconic moments from the trailer emerged (“Flint and Steel”, “The Nether,” “Chicken Jockey”) whooping and clapping followed. It was joyful, and it brought the audience together in a wonderful sense of Minecraft community.
If the audience was made purely of four to nine-year-olds, A Minecraft Movie hit the nail on the head for a fun, engaging, unserious kids film.
For those of us who have been enjoying the game for ten years or more, the film missed the nostalgic notes that could have made it into something special. Using the game’s iconic music more would have created a greater sense of connection to the much-loved game, as well as building on the audience’s sense of nostalgia.
All in all, A Minecraft Movie was weird, wacky, and only watchable once – however, it is worth watching that once, just for the memeability of the entire fiasco.
Brig doesn’t just review films: read more about Minecraft game updates here.
Feature Image Credit: poster by Warner Bros Pictures and Legendary Pictures
Journalism student at the University of Stirling & BRAW Magazine editor 24/25 and 25/26 🙂
You can see my portfolio here: https://www.clippings.me/alicepollard
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