Semesters abroad are an amazing part of the university experience, which I am of course very lucky to experience. But the thing that no one ever talks about is the fear of missing out that comes with being away.
No one ever mentions the anxiety that comes with the changes. Scrolling through social media, seeing all your friends hanging out and having fun without you. Missing out on family events and holidays, seeing pictures of your family pets wishing you could cuddle and play with them. Everyone living their lives without you, returning home to see that things aren’t the same.
You never think that things will change that much in five months, but you’ll be surprised. Already I’m seeing that new stores and restaurants are opening, my friends entering new relationships and my cat has accepted wearing a collar which he never did before I left.
It is difficult to miss important moments. For me, a lot of my close friends are graduating in June. It sucks that I’m missing their last semester and the last time we will all be living in the same place. That’s what makes my FOMO the worst, knowing that I really am missing out on the last times we will all be in uni together.
Don’t get me wrong, being alone in another country isn’t a bad thing. In fact, it’s nice to know that you can be by yourself and that you’re capable of being completely independent. And for that, I am very grateful.
However, there are times when I feel slightly resentful of my surroundings. I’m annoyed at the fact that I’m missing out on the good weather in Scotland, while I’m in Quebec where the snow won’t stop falling and I’ve got to bundle up each time I want to go to the shops. When you’re shivering with cold while trying to study, you get really jealous that you’re missing the start of beer garden season back home.
I miss the coconut berry Red Bulls that I can’t seem to find in any shops here. I miss the fresh Scottish water that I will definitely appreciate so much more when I get back. I miss potato scones and crumpets. I miss beer gardens, rainy days and spending more time looking at the swans on campus than I do studying.
I’m being dramatic of course; it’s only five months away from everything that’s familiar to me. I’ve got the opportunity of a lifetime to live abroad, but still – it’s human nature. You always want what you can’t have.
Featured image credits: Plum McKechnie
