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Interview: Anonymous Stirling University hot chocolate reviewer

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An Instagram account called @stirlingunihotchocolatereview began posting reviews of the hot chocolates from Scran, one of the food outlets on campus, at the start of March. The account quickly grew, and people began to wonder who was behind the engrossing reviews. Brig reached out for an anonymous interview.  

“This account was the sort of really stupid idea, which you have late at night, but never normally go through with, except this time I went through with the idea. I thought, ‘I’m a regular customer here, what if I just suddenly reviewed its hot chocolate for no apparent reason whatsoever,’ just thinking that it would never come to anything. It’s basically just because I drank a lot of hot chocolate from Scran, and I decided to try and make some joke about it.” 

 
The account began as private reviews to their friends but was officially started on March 5, 2022. The reviews are scored out of one to ten and accompanied by a short creative description.  

 
“In the interest of not antagonising the staff at Scran, as long as it is hot chocolate and not just boiling water, they will always get at least a 5 out of 10,” said the anonymous reviewer. “The quality can change quite a bit over the week, and we try to review them regarding each other. However, the quality is quite consistent, so quite often it just depends on how I am feeling that day, sticking with the ‘only scores above 5’ rule if it is actually hot chocolate.  

“Ten out of ten does mean something though. If it is ten out of ten it means it really stood out from the normal quality of hot chocolate. In terms of the text reviews, I kind of just improvise with what I write. 

 
“We plan to expand our scope, though for us the joke originally started that I just kept getting hot chocolate from Scran, which is why the review page mostly consists of Scran reviews. We are working on increasing the scope of reviews to other places around campus though, and that will happen if I become more confident with going to other places other than Scran.  

“I think Scran just has my comfort hot chocolate in it. I always know what I’m getting, at least depending on who is serving that day. There is a difference in quality between the different staff at Scran. I, myself, know more people who are Scran hot chocolate addicts, and they are all on board with this crazy little thing I started up.” 

Featured image credit: @stirlingunihotchocolatereview

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